Comedy Relief: Out-takes From Alleged "Actual" Church Bulletins

The Low Self Esteem Support Group will meet Thursday at 7 p.m.  Please use the back door.

A songfest was hell at the Methodist Church Wednesday.

Remember in prayer those who are sick of our church and community.

Don't let worry kill you.  Let the Church help.

For those of you who have children and don't know it, we have a nursery downstairs.

The ladies of the church have cast off clothing of every kind and they may be seen in the church basement Friday.

Weight Watchers will meet at 7 p.m. at the First Presbyterian Church.  Please use large double door at the side entrance.

Pastor is on vacation.  Massages can be given to church secretary.

The Senior Choir invites any member of the congregation who enjoys sinning to join the choir.

The Associate Minister unveiled the church's new tithing campaign slogan last Sunday: "I Upped My Pledge---Up Yours!"